Staff Bio's >> Chris (HashiriyaS14)

Classifieds Moderator

Up until about when I got out of college, my knowledge of and experience with cars was limited to calendars of half-nekkid women posing seductively on Ferraris. While you’re unlikely to successfully sell me muffler bearings, my mechanical knowledge is pretty cheeseball when compared to most of the rest of the staff. My acumen at gauging a market and generally fleecing my fellow man is outstanding however, hence my assignment as overseer of the NICO Classifieds.

Unlike my automotive experience, my background in commerce arose at an early age when I discovered I could sell all sorts of seemingly-worthless things to all sorts of unsuspecting people. This naturally led to a childhood rife with repercussions for occasionally selling “wrong” things (likely not what you think) but thankfully I have emerged in the wide world of adulthood without a record.

I’ve owned a number of cars since graduating college including several Nissans, but I won’t go the distance to bore anyone with the particulars. I have owned cars, crashed cars, bought cars, sold cars, broken cars, fixed cars, and done a number of other things with cars that neither God nor the Montgomery County Police Department would view in a kind light.

My hobbies include recreational autopsies, defecating and drinking rum. I also collect videogames, passport stamps and interesting stories. I am a financial analyst by trade and I look forward to making off with several million in embezzled shareholder funds in the not-so-distant future.